Liquid Courage
by I-Love-Phan-And-Butts
Summary: Dan and Phil attend Chris's birthday party, and Dan drunkenly tells Phil a secret. How will Phil respond to this new information! Fluff! Rated T for a few swear words, but it's not that bad. :)
1. Chapter 1

Liquid Courage

"Five minutes, Dan!" I yelled down the hall to Dan's room as I straightened my blue tie and fixed a mismatched button on my black button-up. I picked the gift bag up from off my bed and carried it to the kitchen.

"Yeah one sec!" I heard the voice come from the bathroom, where Dan was surely flattening his Hobbit hair before we left. Ten minutes later, Dan emerged in a charcoal gray shirt and a silver and black tie. "You clean up well, Phil!" He said with his glowing smile.

"And you as well, Dan!" I couldn't help but smile at him.

We were on or way to the surprise birthday bash that PJ was throwing for Chris, and it was at a formal London venue near our flat with a DJ, an open bar, and everything a party would need. I couldn't help but think about how over the top it may be, which made me less and less excited to go, but I knew that Dan had been looking forward to it for a while now. We had just gone through a long stretch of work for Radio 1, and I foresaw Dan drinking and partying all the stress away. In my four years living with Dan, I have probably seen him _really_ go hard about 10 times, and he stumbles into our flat wasted off his arse on a lot of the weekends. I'm not much of a partier myself, but sometimes I attend these bacchanalia with Dan so that I can sleep at night knowing I looked after him and kept him safe. "The life of the party, hm..." I said to myself as I stuffed the striped bag with tissue paper and stuck our card in.

When we arrived at the party (fashionably late of course) the music was already blaring and I could feel the bass rippling through my dress shoes. The night club setting was slightly discomforting to me, but Dan's face lit up as if this club scene was his second home. After leaving the gift in the designated present room, we entered the party and met up with our tight group of YouTube friends. It was really great to catch up with everyone, but I regretted getting caught up in the conversation when I noticed that Dan was gone!

"You okay, Phil?" PJ asked me with a concerned look. My face must be more expressive that I thought.

"Yeah it's just, I lost Dan..." I looked around the room quickly, like a meerkat, but the lights were dim and I couldn't really see anything, despite my height advantage.

"He's a big boy, he can handle himself!" PJ chuckled and lightly punched my arm. Even though he has totally right, I shouldn't be worrying, I still had this anxiety hanging over my head until I could find Dan.

The bass was pumping through my ear drums as I made my way over to the bar. I ordered a ginger ale as if I was the designated driver, even though we just took a fifteen minute walk trough the city to get here and neither of us would be driving.

"I want that one!" A fake blonde, fake tanned barbie whisper-shouted to her equally plastic friend about a foot from me. These scantily clad women were holding drinks and pointing with their overly long and decorated nails to none other than Daniel Howell. He was dancing with a glass of vodka in his hand, and people gravitated and surrounded him from all angles.

"Yeah he is totally cute, you should hit that," the second barbie replied to the first.

"Nope. Nope nope nope nope nope. That one is off limits you can't have him," I blurted to them without thinking.

"... What the fuck?" The first barbie looked pissed, but I could tell was too drunk to have any real, coherent thoughts.

"Neither of you lovely ladies will be getting with Dan tonight. Sorry to disappoint you," I said it as politely as could be, but the words themselves didn't match my manners. The girls looked at each other and walked off, fuming.

"It's the remix to ignition, hot and fresh out the kitchen, the way you rollin that body got every man in here wishin!" Dan's slurred drunk voice sang along to the DJ's choice while other intoxicated boys and girls crowded him, danced, and oversexualized themselves on the dance floor. I left the bar and headed towards this outdoor balcony, swirling my ginger ale in small circles over the ledge. I spent about a half hour thinking until I was finally approached.

"Hellooo Philly!" It was Dan, and he was suddenly holding my arm and feeling the fabric of the shirt while he struggled to support himself. His pink cheeks and cloudy eyes told me he'd taken the fast route and got drunk in the hard stuff right away.

"Hey Dan, how's it going?" I held on to his little shoulders and stood him up straight.

"_I'm_ greaaat, but _you_ are not! Having! Fun!" He booped my nose with each of the last three words. "Why are you outside all by yourself Philly?"

"Oh you know, just getting some fresh air."

"What's in there?"

"Ginger ale."

"Nooo Phillip!" He wrapped his arms around my neck and stared up at me with those toxic brown eyes. All I could do is sigh. "Phillip I don't feel so good." He was falling over again.

"Okay Dan, I'll walk you in and I'll take you to the bathroom, okay?"

Before a minute passed Dan was hurling profusely over a toilet while I held his hair back. Just the sounds made me feel sick, but I had to hold it together. Dan kept on expelling the poison while I kept his perfect bangs out of his face, while his eyes watered. He flushed the toilet. "Ew that was bloody disgusting."

"Tell me about it," I forced a laugh and smile. I didn't want Dan to see how grossed out I was by his vomiting because I needed him to be comfortable with me and take this as a bonding experience, even though it was disgusting and awful.

"Can we take a break, Philly?" The music still polluted the air around us and I could tell it was making Dan more and more woozy.

"Yes, of course we can, Daniel."

I ordered a glass of water for the drunken boy and I helped him over to the present room, near the entrance. We entered and noticed that we were alone with all of Chris's gifts, and it was quiet and peaceful. I sat Dan down on the floor and gave him the water, knowing he would need it after his puke fest.

"There were some girls looking for you earlier, but I told them they weren't allowed to hook up with you," I admitted to Dan. If I was going to be a clock block I should at least be honest about it. "I'm sorry. I just got a bad feeling around them and I didn't want to see my best friend get taken advantage of." We were sitting criss-cross facing each other, just like we sat anytime we would have a serious talk at our flat.

"Good, Phillip." Dan slurred. I loved when he used my full name. "I don't want to get with any of those sluts anyway."

Hearing Dan say that made me really happy, probably happier than I should have been. He grabbed my hand and squeezed it. "You're always looking out for me, Philly."

"Of course Dan. I will always have your back, no matter what."

He giggled and sighed, which in itself, was intoxicating. I didn't need a drink in my hand to see stars tonight.

"Wanna know the only slut I actually wanted to get with?" He raised his eyebrows cheekily. What a little tart.

"Sure why not."

"... You." When he said it he cocked his head to one side like a baby owl.

"Very funny Dan. That's the alcohol talking." Even though he wasn't consciously saying these things, I couldn't help but wonder if he really meant them.

"I loooooove you Phillyyy..." He drew it out as long as he could and then laid his head on my shoulder. His ruffled hair tickled my jaw as he cuddled on me and held on to my arm like a koala bear.

"You're not going to remember this tomorrow, are you?" He didn't process my question. He just spoke.

"They don't call it liquid courage for nothin', Phillip." I could barely make out what he had said before he passed out on me.


	2. Chapter 2

Liquid Courage - Chapter 2

I let out a long sigh and began stroking his hair, hoping to comfort Dan in his drunken coma. After about ten minutes of this, I picked him up bridal style and said goodbye to our friends and wished Chris a happy birthday. As soon as I could, I left the party behind me and carried Dan home.

One would think that carrying almost 180 pounds down the street for almost a mile would be tiring, but surprisingly, I barely noticed the weight. I was just thankful that I could get Dan home safe and sound, without any girls or boys pressuring him to do anything he wouldn't normally do. I began to notice how protective I am over Dan. When people look at him the wrong way, hit on him, or hate on his work, it makes me want to knock them out, regardless of the fact that I am a pacifist. Now that I think about it, Dan is probably the only person I really want to fight for.

I watched the stars the whole way we walked until we reached our building, and only when I laid him down on his bed did I notice the lactic acid that built up in my muscles from the walk. It was already 3:00 AM. I decided that the best thing to go is keep a glass of iced coconut water on his bedside table, recalling something Dan had told me months ago about how coconut water is great for hangovers.

Before tucking Dan into bed, I untied his tie and hung it up along with his shirt and pants, leaving him in only boxers and a t shirt as pajamas. He was sleeping soundly and I doubted that he had any vomiting capabilities left in him, so I felt it was safe to turn off his lamp and leave him to sleep till the morning.

Getting into my own bed and changing out of my formal wear, I felt exhausted, both mentally and physically. What if Dan really did love me? Do people really tell the truth when they drink? Do I love Dan? Why is it bothering me so much? I had no idea.

With an over active mind and a completely tired body, I eventually forced myself into a slumber, still thinking about Dan.


	3. Chapter 3

Liquid Courage - Chapter 3

Around noon Dan came stalking out of his bedroom. The only adjective I can come up with to describe how he looked was... Spent. Daniel Howell looked completely and utterly spent. Old sweat covered his face, and dark bags replaced tight skin under his eyes. His furrowed-brow and squinting expression was enough to keep me quiet for the rest of the day.

"Turn off the fucking sun," he growled as he refilled his water and sat down. Without saying anything I heeded his command, going around the flat and closing every window blind I could until our house was a chamber of darkness.

"This god damn hangover..." Dan grumbled to himself as be wrapped up in a fluffy white blanket. "What even happened last night..?"

"We went to Chris's birthday party, remember?"

He scowled at me a little. I'm pretty sure my response was okay, but instead he was responding negatively to the cheerful energy that resides in my voice every day.

This was about to be a _long_ day.

Even though I had a million things to do: laundry, edit a new video, buy groceries, water the plants... All I wanted to do was devote my time to making Dan feel better. Did I want him to utter those three words to me again, completely consciously? Maybe. But first he had to be taken care if. I guess I would start by giving him a painkiller for his headache.

By now he was sitting in the dark of his room, still wrapped in the blanket. "Thanks Phil," he almost whispered it, but at least he didn't sound so hostile and angry anymore. "For everything."

"Everything?" I inquired back.

"You know, for the coconut water and the pills and for bringing me home and listening to me and not being a bitch about any of my actions today." He said it quickly, like a run on sentence that lacked commas. Had he been preparing this? A grand thank-you when I was simply doing what friends do?

"Of course I wouldn't be a b-word to you today Dan, I have no reason to ever be mad at you." I gently sat next to him and started to rub his back in little circles. This always makes him feel better when he is under the weather. "How much of last night do you remember?"

"More and more is coming back. How did we get home anyway? I totally blacked out at the party."

"Oh ya know. I, uh. Carried you home."

"PHIL!" Dan was beaming and socked me playfully. "Why didn't you just call a cab or something?"

"We live _right here,_ it would be lazy if I called a cab!"

"I weigh 180 you crazy twat."

"I didn't want anyone else to see you like that."

He blinked a few times and gave me that unintentionally cute, innocent, puppy dog stare. "You carried me the whole way?"

"Yes sir, bridal style!" I couldn't go more than five seconds of staring into his face without smiling and giggling like a child.

"You must be really strong then." He was totally impressed, I saw it plastered on his expression.

"How many times do I have to tell you I'm Thor?" I flexed and, much to me surprise as well, a nice thick bulge appeared. I actually didn't know I had that.

"Go pick that up!" Dan was pointing to his dresser, heavy and full of clothes.

"No way! The drawers will fall out and you'll yell at me for making noise, and then you'll make me pick up your stuff!"

"Pleeeaaaassseeee Philly! It'll make me feel better!" Oh crap, he knew how much I cared and now he is taking this opportunity to make me do embarrass myself for his own enjoyment! Typical Dan. He was still grinning excitedly. I'll admit, it was really refreshing to see that bright, sober smile.

"Oh, fine then." I said as I walked over to the dresser and wrapped my arms around it, and lifted. It was heavy and dense, but I could handle it for a few more seconds. I did a twirl and a kick for flare before putting it back down and shrugging. It was interesting that Dan was getting off on this so much, but hey, whatever floats his boat.

"Now me!" He squealed, reminding me of a phan girl. Okay enough of that, just tell me if you love me.

"Don't you want to get some rest now? No offense but you still look horrid."

"Nope!" He sprung up and sauntered to the other side of his room. "One! Two! Three!"

I boy was running briskly towards me, and leaped forward at the last second. Luckily I caught him perfectly, minimizing the wobbling so that he wouldn't puke again. I readjusted his slim body so that I was holding him up, facing me. His thighs closed tightly around my waist and his arms around my neck and shoulders again, just like last night. He stared at me intensely as we stood there, holding each other. God knows I just about kissed him then and there.

"Feeling any better?" He simply nodded and leaned closer to my face. Though he didn't go in for the kiss, his nose nuzzled against my cheek longingly. When he blinked, I felt his eyelashes brush my nose gently like a breeze. I wrapped my arms tighter around his body, again not noticing the weight at all, just treasuring the moment. This was more than heavenly. "Dan..."

"Hmm?" He purred into my ear, softly.

"Do you remember what you said to me last night, in the gift room?"

"No... Wait I think I told you that I was on the 'truth juice' or something stupid like that."

"Liquid courage." I corrected him. "Dan... Last night, you accidentally said that you are in love with me. Is it true?" I locked my light blue eyes with his brown, thirsting for an answer.

Dan gasped and let go, so I took this as a queue to put him down. "Please don't run away, I want to hear it." Looking back now, I am surprised at how confident as masculine I sounded in that moment. I cupped his shoulders in my hands and stroked.

"It's so embarrassing." He buried his face in his hands.

"Why Dan? What's wrong?"

"I just... It's just that I'm so ashamed that you heard it like that," his cheeks were heating up, I could tell. The poor thing.

"So it's true then? You love me, Daniel?" Please let it be true. Please, please let it be true.

"What do you think?"

"I have no idea if it was true or not, but I sure hope it was. No matter your answer, you must know that I love you, Dan. Last night and today made me come to terms with this and realize it myself. It explains so much, Dan." I took the shaken boy into my arms and held him for a lifetime. I just couldn't find a way for me to let go. Not then.

"It is true, Phil." The muffled voice was filtered through my shirt and I let out a deep breath. He loved me. He truly, wildly, and soberly loved me back. I couldn't have contained my smile if my life depended on it. He finally said it, confirming the mutualism of our feelings! "You have my heart, I swear."

My vision started to blur and I felt my own tear run down my cheek. Why was I getting so emotional? Dan looked up and saw the tear of joy. and then kissed it off my face. All I could do was smile, as I lifted him back up to the position where I held him as he straddled me. Closing the gap, I pressed smooth my lips against his soft ones and we shared a long, passionate kiss as I walked him back to the bed.

This marks the night that Daniel Howell, my best friend, became my lover and my life.


End file.
